The Value of Nothing
Sometimes we live our lives in such a busy way that we hardly ever pause to take a breath. I try to make a conscious effort to stop and notice and give gratitude. But it is not always easy.
As a mother of numerous children, it is difficult to even find time to have a glass of water. It kinda goes like this: oh, I’m thirsty, I am going to go and get a glass of water, hang on that nappy SMELLS, oh and look at that mess on the floor, what do you mean you are hungry, again? Right, what was I doing???? And so on and so forth.
Last weekend, ALL of my children went to their grandparents’. My husband followed on a business trip the next day. All of a sudden, for the first time in about three years, I was HOME ALONE.
Because I was prepared for this and did not want to fall in a heap, I wrote myself a HUGE list of things “to do”. I figured that this way, I would be much too busy to have time to sit down and think about anyone let alone miss them.
And I exhausted myself for three days straight. The house looks great. The garden looks great. I look great. My web pages and social media are all updated. I finally finished the two books I had wanted to read.
But not today. Today is a “nothing” day. Don’t get me wrong, my list could easily take me through to next year if I wanted to keep going but I am choosing to disregard “the list”. I am choosing to find appreciation in the “nothing”.
Taking the time to really listen to my body and do what it wants me to do. So far I drank about three litres of water AND I have been able to go to the toilet exactly when my body wanted me to, not after doing a gazillion things first, and nearly requiring a Tena Lady by the time I got there! Let me tell you, having lots of children sure does take a toll on the old bladder. And if you are holding it in, the last thing you need is a sneaky cough or a sneeze or it’s all over rover!
And I have allowed myself to think about my babies and how much I miss them. And I didn’t break down in a heap like I thought I might. I know it’s okay to miss them and it’s okay that they are building their independence without me. And that one day my house will be empty for real and I will just have to deal with that. Because, I’m like, a grown up and stuff…. (NOT!)
And I am taking pleasure in the small things like being able to have a shower without an audience. Leaving all the drawers and cupboards unlocked, leaving sharp knives on the bench… you know, it’s the little things….
So, I might describe my day today as a “nothing” day, as in, doing nothing or…. I could call it my “reflection” day, my “me” day, my “finding joy in the small things” day.
However I refer to it, it holds value for me. For even emptiness and voids are always filled with “something”, we just have to find what that is, and then appreciate the value they hold.